The polite way to say I have to pee

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners decided to quiz her male students to see how they would handle this question. 

She was a little concerned as to the responses she could get from some of the men in the class but decided to pursue the question anyway.

Here is what happened.

“Gentleman, how would you announce to your dinner date that you have to go to the restroom?”

“What about you Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?”

Michael said, “Just a minute, I have to go pee.”

The teacher responded by saying, “That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?”

Sherman said, “I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom.  I’ll be right back.”

“That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?”

“I would say, ‘Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine who I hope to introduce you to after dinner.'”

The teacher fainted.

Restroom cheering

I went to lunch with my brother and wife today. We went to a sports bar on opening day of Professional Football. Big Shotz in Winston-Salem NC is a good restaurant that Becky and I frequent often.

The Carolina Panthers were playing the New York Giants, and in a NC town, this was an exciting game with equally excited patrons in the bar. The bar was loud and they had the TV cranked up all around us. We could see the game thru the patio windows and here the play by play over the bar speakers.

After a good hamburger and a few drinks, I had to go inside and visit my porcelain buddy in the restroom.

I walked into the men’s room and even with a full bar, this room was empty.

I walked over to the urinal and prepared to relieve myself. For those of you who do not understand the plumbing issues of a 50+ yr. old man, you do not start doing your business right away. Some days, it may take 5-10 seconds to get your body working properly as you hover over a urinal.

With the football game playing over the bar speakers, I heard what I thought was the sportscaster speaking about me, “Hey folks, this is getting exciting now. Who knows how it may turn out. This guy can win this game.”

Exactly at the instance that I started to do my business, the crowd in the bar and on the TV started to cheer as the sportscaster began saying, “Look at this guy go! He is dang good! I think he’ll end up in the Hall of Fame”

I finished my business in the restroom and walked back out to the Patio with my chest pumped up and just a little more attitude in my step.

Thanks to Fred for providing me with this story. I hope you enjoyed it.