Tag Archives: love

What would David Michael be doing now?

crossI was three years old in 1961. My family lived in Barnesville Maryland in a small farm house at the foot of Sugarloaf Mountain.

My little brother, David Michael was born on August 22 1961.

David Michael died in October of the same year. Just a little more than one month old.

I don’t remember my little brother, however I often wonder, if he were alive today, what would he be doing.

Here is a good guess as to what David Michael would be doing today.

He is 52 years old today (August 2013). He is living in a nice house in the suburbs of Philadelphia Pennsylvania.

David Michael’s wife is Samantha. They have 3 children who are now between 24 and 29 years old. All of the children have moved out of their parent’s home and now live with their respective partners in the Philadelphia area. Samantha and David Michael often cajole their kids for grandkids.

Samantha is a successful real estate broker, who loves her business. David Michael has his own business management consulting business. He is very successful and enjoys his work.

David Michael loves spending time with his wife, children and their partners. Regularly all of them gather at one of the family members homes. Each gathering is a party because they enjoy each other’s company, laughing, cooking, dining, telling stories, discussing current societal topics, watching movies and playing card games together.

David Michael is a community leader and active civic volunteer. He loves to help others and enjoys seeing good people succeed when they try harder than they thought they could and by accepting a compassionate tug up from someone with a caring heart.

David Michael and Samantha travel frequently and enjoy the vineyards of California, the lakes of Minnesota and Blue Ridge mountains.

David Michael and I don’t talk very often, we are both busy with our own respective families, communities and businesses. When we do talk, we pick right up where we left off.

Often when I imagine what my little brother is doing now I can clearly see that he is in love with his wife and kids, happy in life and knows that he lives a blessed life.

I compensate for never knowing my little brother by imagining him as a happy, successful, imaginative, passionate, giving and loving person.

I am comforted for the death of my little brother by my imagination and my belief that God is caring for David Michael as his child in heaven.

Are you with the Right Partner?

Partners hugging

ARE YOU WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

During a seminar, a woman asked,” How do I know if I am with the right person?”

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, “It depends. Is that your partner?” In all seriousness, she answered “How do you know?” Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it’s weighing on your mind replied the author.

Here’s the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.

People in love sometimes say, “I was swept of my feet.”Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):

The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a “DECISION”. Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO! ♥

Author Unknown

Thank you to my daughter for sharing this article with me

Thank you Everyone who made this HAPPEN

This Saturday I had the privilege of “marry off” another of my daughters to a great guy.

We started our celebrations on Friday and a whole bunch of great people helped us make it all happen.

This is a thank you to all who helped make the celebrations Great  & Fabulous!

Rachel, the Bride who is one of the infamous Myrtles, had been planning her own wedding for well over 20 years. She arranged all of the support staff and put together a flawless task list and itinerary. The last few months have been non-stop planning, ordering and arranging for a great team of outsourced service providers. (big words huh?) You did a great job Rachel – thanks

Sid, the Groom and now a member of Boppy’s Stable of Stallions, did as a groom should. He managed his grooms men and gladly did everything that Rachel asked him to do with no disagreements. He never showed any signs of stress or fatigue thru out the weekend. Good work Sid.

Rebecca (aka Bum), my beautiful wife (of nearly 35 years) executed said tasks list and  itinerary thru lots of hard work and staff management. We all knew our roles and tasks. She toughed thru the little bit of itinerary & service chaos and made rapid fire plan changing decisions like a pro. I love you babe!

The other 3 Myrtles (daughters) pitched in on all of the tasks with nary a worry or concern. From the planning & setup phase all the way thru locking the door at the hall. I love you girls.

Marc, another member of the Stable of Stallions, orchestrated a fantastic meal, far better than expected or requested. This guy loves to plan, prepare and deliver fabulous food. He does it with a big smile and a still manages to play Dad to the needy nearly 2yr & 3yr olds boys. Thanks for all you did Marc.

Oscar, yet another member of the Stable of Stallions, managed lots of logistics and made sure the right stuff was in the right place at the right time. If anyone needed something he would jump in and help out. Even make a 120 mile round trip late night drive to the airport to pickup a family friend or chase ibuprofen to squelch a headache. Oscar also pitched in on the rehearsal dinner as the rest of of us rehearsed. You are the Man Oscar!

Francie & Alan, my sister & brother (in laws) and their group took care of lots of stuff at both the rehearsal party & wedding reception. They were instrumental in making lots of tedious tasks go bye-bye. They never asked what we wanted them to do, they just jumped in and made it happen. You guys are great – Thanks

Tony, a fantastic family friend joined us early in the day and turned on dimes as we asked him to take care of this, then that, and then back to something else all day long. You’re a good Friend Tony! Thanks

Gary Whitehurst put the jingle in the event. He spun the vinyls and disks that we needed to sing, dance and have a Freakin Great Time! He never missed a beat and smiled the entire night. Thanks Gary – We really appreciate you.

Thanks a bunch for the great images captured by Megan Summers Photography at the Rehearsal party – Lots of great kid pics, laughing and playing all evening. Thanks Megan.

The professional photography team from Carmon Leigh Photography worked non stop at the scripted and impromptu pics during the wedding. These ladies were a blast to work with.

Jessica, our delightful and capable bartender managed the bar effectively with a constant smile. We are so glad we added you to the team Jessica.

Michael Trivette, Big Bro to Sid and the best man, was there at every move to offer any and all help we either needed or asked for. He was a lot of fun to work with as well. He never stopped helping us even beyond the event when we left items behind that needed to be dealt with. I really enjoyed getting to know you Michael. Thanks for all you did.

Brittany Mitchell used her imagination, artistic flair and fabulous baking experiences to create a beautiful & tasty wedding cake. She had her husband, Tommy & her Dad help her deliver and setup the cake. You guys are the best!

The florist arranged beautiful flowers, corsage & butineers and worked hard to help us deal with just a few snafus that occur with these things. Thanks for your help.

Matt Capps, a long time family friend and Associate Pastor of Calvary Baptist Church, provided both an enjoyable and loving God filled ceremony. Few ministers will spend the time and effort that Matt did to get to know the Bride & Groom in order to really share a memorable and meaningful ceremony. Thanks Matt, (Laura & Sol).

The bridesmaids, my girls and dear family friends, were beautiful and fully engaged in making this wedding a fantastic and spirited even.

The grooms men are not only loving friends and family, but a lively addition to the celebration. These guys know how to party and have each other’s back thru life. Good People – thanks guys!

My inlaws, Ray & Reva were non stop in their involvement and engagement with everyone.  Thanks folks.

Lesha & Sidney, (Sids Mom & Dad) were a pleasure to get together this weekend and thanks for Sid.

Jackie Gold – thanks for the quick publishing of impromptu event pics – It was a blast to meet you and your family.

Thanks to the many other great folks who attended & participated and got involved in the celebration.

I am sure I am missing some individuals, please forgive me. I will thank you in person soon for all you did to help us with this
celebration.

Being the Dad of 4 beautiful, loving and spirited women is a blessing. You can’t be an average kind of guy and marry one of my girls.

I now have three powerful, dynamic, fantastic son-in-laws. My Stable of Stallions continues to grow. I’m a blessed and proud Dad.

I end this post with a confirmation for myself.

I am blessed beyond what any Dad would expect.

Thank you God.

Happy Fathers Day 2012

Before they are born, a father prays that his children will grow up to be happy people.

He carries his babies and never lets harm come to them, striving to make them happy, often to no avail as a baby is supposed to cry.

A father prays to God that his babies will always be safe and happy.

A father works long and hard every day to put clothes on his children’s back and food in their belly.

A father will praise his children’s accomplishments and accept their mistakes, not without a tear or two, as his children travel thru those often tumultuous teenage years.

A father will guide his children thru the developing years as they reach forward into life as teenagers.

A father will pray to God that he has shared enough wisdom, morals and instruction for his teenagers to grow up and be happy.

A father will encourage and guide his developing young adult’s passions and dreams as they ponder what the next steps of life will become for them.

A father will support his developing young adults as they bang, scuff and scratch their proverbial knees, elbows and toes of adulthood, often with a tear, but always with a firm, steady hand when requested or needed.

A father will pray that the work he did as the father of a baby, a young child, a teenager and then as a developing adult will have been enough for his teenager to grow up to be happy.

A father will lend an ear, a shoulder even a needed dollar to his grown children, (aka friends).

A father will be involved in his good friend’s (aka children’s) life, caring for them as a good friend (aka father) should.

A father (aka friend) will listening to the stories of become a contributing member of society, professional, a business person, involved in the community and father or mother themselves. He will proudly watch them become all this, only giving guidance when asked.

A father will work, laugh and play with these friends (aka children), as he would with any other good, trusted and loved friend.

A father will smile when others speak of his good friends (aka children), and proudly admit to them, “That is my child!”

A father will always give thanks to God that the work he did as the father of a baby, a young child, a teenager, a developing adult and adult has created a happy person and a good friend.

Happy Fathers Day to me and all of my other father friends!

 

A good view

I rode down I-40 into Winston-Salem this morning. Not much different than most mornings, except for the view and the thoughts that were bouncing around in my head.

Most mornings I ride into a beautiful sunrise, today was not much different. I love riding into the sunrise. I generally will say out loud, “Thank you for this day God – please help me to make the most of it for you and for me.” Of course, at 70 miles per hour, the only one who hears me say this is myself, and hopefully God.

This morning the view was a little different, my wife (affectionately called Bum) was driving her car just in front of me.

It’s not a long trip from Advance to Winston-Salem, maybe 15 minutes. But driving into the sunrise with Bum driving in front of me made my mind wander differently than most mornings.

My mind drifted from the normal “what am I going to do today” to “My life”. It was a great ride.

I smiled as I thought about all that I have that makes my life good. The relationship I have with Bum and all of the things we have done together.

As I came upon the split where Bum goes to the left and I go to the right, my mind was all over the future that we have together. The plans that we have for ourselves, our family and the people in our life.

I sped up a little before I hit the split so I could wave at Bum. I know, go ahead and yell at me, but it was important for me to wave at my wife and see her smile as we hit the split.

This was a better ride into the work day than any other day.

Thanks Babe.

 

Don’t get screwed getting engaged

source - Kay JewelersI found a receipt for a Diamond ring this weekend. It was in the back of a U-Haul truck last weekend.

The receipt showed somebody purchased an engagement ring, 1 year insurance and lifetime cleaning. I could only assume a guy bought it for his sweet heart.

He didn’t spring for a big diamond. The total purchase was $678.97, however I am sure it is a pretty ring and his sweet heart is going to be excited to get it.

The receipt had a note written on it from again, what I assume was the sales person. It said, “Congratulations Bill.  I wish you and Suzy an eternity of happiness.” The note was signed “Shirley” (Note – I changed the names to protect the real people involved)

In the middle of receipt was what made me think that Bill or Suzy could get screwed badly with this deal.

Bill had purchased this ring on terms.  He signed up for 6 months same as cash.

Now, many of us have done this often.  It can be a good cash flow solution.  Except, if you miss a payment or are even one day late.

The terms that Bill agreed to was 6 months same as cash with 27.5% interest, waived completely as long as he made a monthly payment of $113.16 every month before the 15th of each month.

OK, here is where Bill and/or Suzy could get screwed. And I assure you if Suzy gets screwed here, Bill will never live it down, NEVER.

If Bill fails to make the payment in time for any reason at all, the interest is applied back to the original date.

This could be an additional $200+, if not more. If Bill screws up really big time and has to ask Suzy for some money to make the payment, WOW, that’s going to be an even bigger problem for him.

Bill, it’s really really important that you not miss any payments on Suzy’s ring. That would not be a good way to start the engagement. I’m sure you know this and you’ll be ok. But just in case you do screw up, my Uncle Guido can help you out.

And – Congratulations to you & Suzy.

Lucky me

12 years ago a new person came into my life

By no means did I invite him into my life.

To some degree, I really didn’t want him here

I actually feared his arrival, yet I knew there was no way to keep him away

Once he showed up I realized there was no way to get rid of him

However, over time I grew to accept his presence

I eventually learned not to fear him

He brought passion for everything he does

He brought the desire to learn new stuff everyday

He brought dedication to doing the best at everything he does

He brought compassion for the people in his life

He brought interesting and sometimes deep conversations

He brought laughter and a fun sense of humor

He brought a helping hand when one is needed

He brought a different yet honest perspective on life

As the days flew by I eventually grew to Love him

Eventually he fathered children

His passion, desire, compassion, care, laughter, helping hand and love seemed to grow even more

Our friendship continues to grow every day

Truth be told, he has become my son in many different ways

You see, he married my daughter 12 years ago today

Many hear me say that I live a Blessed Life

Having Oscar as my son is one of the reasons I know this

Happy 12th Anniversary Oscar & Jessie

I love you

Boppy

I Love You

Today is Valentine’s day and I have to work late tonight. I hope that I don’t get sacrificed because of this. I know that the ancient Romans may be responsible for the name of our modern day of love. Emperor Claudius II executed two men, both named Valentine, on Feb. 14 of different years in the 3rd century A.D. I’m glad my name is not Valentine.

Despite the fear, or maybe in part because of it, I want my wife to hear that “I Love HER more than I love anything else in the world!“, but I have to fulfill the commitments I have made and won’t get home till late.

So, I’m going to try to make it up to her by publicly telling her how much I love her and asking others to let her know this.

Here is my call to action for anyone who knows my wife:

I hope that someone reads this story this morning and will let my wife know that I wrote it for her. Send her a text, email, Facebook message, Tweet, LinkedIn message, call her or walk up to her and let he know that “I LOVE YOU!

If you need to know how much I love her, follow along folks.

My Public Statement of Love for my Wife:

Baby, I love you more than words can say. These three words say it all – I LOVE YOU!

You are the sexiest and most beautiful woman I have ever met and fortunately for me, you have found some happiness with me and have decided to stay around. I am so fortunate that I get to hold your hand, sit beside you and share my pillows with you. I LOVE YOU!

You have given me strength and hope in all I do and because of this I dream and chase my dreams. I LOVE YOU!

Because of the love that you share with me, we have beautiful children who are the reason I am who I am and have shaped the journey that we have been on together. I LOVE YOU!

Because of you I have purpose in my life.  You taught me to give, laugh, play and enjoy life and again, because of you, I understand the value of this so much more. I LOVE YOU!

You let me be who I am and do what I do because you love and believe in me. Even when I am playing the role of “Idiot”, you let me be who I am, knowing that I will return to being and acting much more positive. I LOVE YOU!

You support the crazy things that I want to have and want to do. I LOVE YOU!

You let me have my fantasies and even encourage me to some degree by laughing with me as I share the crazy stuff that is in my head. Yes, we will write this book one day. I LOVE YOU!

I don’t do cards, chocolates or flowers. I’m not a romantic or sentimental guy.  I did buy you a gift this year and I hope you enjoy it, even though it’s not wrapped in pretty wrapping paper with a card.

I offer you all the Love that I have to share and only offer it to you.

I imagine the time I will have with you and smile both inward and outward. Sometimes people think I am strange when I bust out with a smile for no known reason (to them)

I pray to God that you and I will be able to walk hand in hand thru life forever.

I recently heard someone say that she loves her husband because, “my hand fits his.” We don’t just fit each other. We fuel each other’s lives and aspirations and dreams. I want to do this forever because I LOVE YOU!

Please meet me as I head for our pillows tonight.

We’ll laugh and hug. We’ll kiss and then you can call me “Idiot” for my blog post. I’ll know that You LOVE ME and you’ll know that I LOVE YOU!

Happy Valentines Day Baby!

Never Judge anyone

A doctor entered the hospital in hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery. He answered the call ASAP, changed his clothes and went directly to the surgery block.

He found the boy’s father going and coming in the hall waiting for the doctor. Once seeing him, the dad yelled:
“Why did you take all this time to come? Don’t you know that my son’s life is in danger? Don’t you have the sense of responsibility?”

The doctor smiled and said:
“I am sorry, I wasn’t in the hospital and I came the fastest I could after receiving the call…… And now, I wish you’d calm down so that I can do my work”

“Calm down?! What if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??” said the father angrily

The doctor smiled again and replied: “I will say what Job said in the Holy Bible “From dust we came and to dust we return, blessed be the name of God”. Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go and intercede for your son, we will do our best by God’s grace”

“Giving advice when we’re not concerned is so easy” Murmured the father.

The surgery took some hours after which the doctor went out happy, “Thank God! Your son is saved!”

And without waiting for the father’s reply he carried on his way running. “If you have any question, ask the nurse!!”

“Why is he so arrogant? He couldn’t wait some minutes so that I ask about my son’s state” Commented the father when seeing the nurse minutes after the doctor left.

The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: “His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was in the burial when we called him for your son’s surgery. And now that he saved your son’s life, he left running to finish his son’s burial.”

NEVER JUDGE ANYONE because you never know how their life is and as to what is happening or what they’re going through.

I got this story from a friend on Facebook.  It may not be true, but it is worthy of thought. I wish he had told me the source.

What rewards have you received

I have the privilege of attending a life celebration of a man who has accumulated great rewards during his journey thru life. It is these rewards that helped him to pass away peacefully and provided some comfort for his family.

His life journey has not been captured by ESPN, Travel Channel or Readers Digest.  The life he lived was not awe inspiring, death defying or miraculous. He did not collect a bunch of medals, awards, trophies or plaques from local dignitaries.

The rewards this man has accumulated are numerous and worth more than money, precious stones or gold.

The rewards this man has accumulated are real, yet he is able to take them with him to his grave.

The rewards this gentleman has accumulate thru his life can not be boxed up and put into storage.

The rewards this man has collected do not lay around the house needing regular dusting or shifting to make room for the next great reward.

The rewards this man accumulated are not listed on anyone’s bucket list. And, unlike a wrestlers trophy belt, these rewards can not be taken away by another.

You see, he passed away knowing that the rewards he accumulated are stored in the hearts of all those he touched through out his life.

His wife, his brother, his daughters and son-in-laws.  His grand children, his nieces and nephews, his neighbors and many others.

He knew these rewards existed.  Not that he could touch them or see their shiny chrome and jewels, but because he felt them from the support, help, compassion and care that many shared with him.

My last conversation with this man clearly told me he knew he had been bestowed these rewards.

As we sat in his home, laughing and talking into the night, he indirectly and repeatedly asked one question. To me, I could tell that he was not asking a question, but instead sharing with us that he knew of the rewards he had accumulated.

“I have a Great Family.” Each time he made this statement, in the form of a question. Yet, I could see in his eyes that he was making a statement, not asking a question.  He knew that his family was the main source of  his greatest reward in life.

He received this reward from his wife thru all that she did for him.

He received this reward from his daughters from all they did for him over the years and up unto the last moments of his life.

His son-in-laws and grandchildren bestowed this reward on him thru the tireless help, care and happiness they gave him freely.

He received this reward from the dog who stayed by his side thru his final days.

He received this reward from his brother in part thru the numerous compassionate conversations only brothers can share.

He was proud to receive this reward from his many friends and neighbors.

He knew that these rewards were real and for him to keep, because they were bestowed upon him with no strings attached.

Despite this man taking these rewards with him, they are still visible in the smiles, the tears, the laughter, stories and memories that he leaves behind with his family.

He has been bestowed these rewards because he cared, he gave, and he loved. He did not seek these rewards.

He received these rewards from many who participated in the life of the man who only sought to be, the best husband, father, brother, neighbor and friend a person can be.

For this, he received in return Love, the greatest of rewards.

Love is not a reward you seek, but one that is bestowed upon you when you give it freely.

This reward provides peace to those it is shared with when someone you love passes on.

Love, and you will receive the greatest of rewards.