How do I say these words to her?
This question had been weighing heavily on his mind for weeks now.
He had finally given up on the relationship, but did not know how to tell her.
In the beginning he felt special.
The conversations, messages and phone calls were all alluring, often personal and seductive in many different ways. She often shared tantalizing videos with him.
He felt that she could be the one.
He had been tempted to try another for his new relationship.
Some seemed interesting to him, but he felt they were just a little too tawdry, maybe a little bit fake. He steered clear of them.
There were others that were interested in him as well. He found some to be too glamorous, too full of life and zest for him. He thought they might only be interested in his money.
He soon discounted all of these and turned his attention back to her.
She always treated him well. She always met all of his expectations. She even offered him gifts regularly. She never seemed interested in money. She seemed to care for him because of who he was and how he treated her. She regularly told him that their relationship was built on trust and respect. This made him happy.
She was always pleasant when he saw her. Her smile lit up the room and her soft voice was always pleasant to his ears. The other guys were jealous of his relationship with her. “Wow man, you got lucky,” they would say.
Every time they talked, she was eager to hear from him. She wanted to listen to him share his dreams and his plans for the future. She was delighted, often giggling when he talked about “taking their relationship to another level.” He enjoyed making her feel special.
Early in the relationship he was ecstatic. He was overjoyed that he had found the one for him.
However relationships don’t always last. In the fifth year of their relationship the happiness began to deteriorate.
She began treating him with less respect and compassion. She nearly stopped caring about his needs and desires all together. When he asked her to help him with something, she acted as if he was being unreasonable and pushy.
Yet, her expectations of him never changed. She expected him to spend money on her, just as always. Regardless of how she treated him, she expected him to fulfill all of her needs.
Over time the divide between them grew deeper and wider.
When they talked, she acted as if she pretended there was no problem. However, he could feel the passion was no longer there.
“Our relationship is important to me, I’ll do anything to keep us together,” she would say. Sometimes with emotion, often as if from a script. This hurt him.
She said, “I care for you and want our relationship to grow.” He had heard these words from her so many times. Eventually he no longer valued them.
Each time she failed to deliver on her promise to do better, they talked. He wanted her to do better in the relationship. It was as important to him, but he could tell it was not important to her.
“Please, trust me. I will do better. I need you,” she would say. These pleadings stung him deeply each time she uttered them.
The conversations slowly turned into only email messages. He no longer wanted to talk with her, yet he still did not know how to tell her it was over.
At times he felt that despite the trouble, he should stay with her. Their relationship had gone on for nearly five years now. This was a long time to him.
He asked some of his friends what to do. Some suggested that he keep trying. Some friends tried to introduce him to others.
Some days he worried about her, while other days he was so upset he just wanted to call her one last time and yell at her, “It’s over! You have ruined our relationship and I never want to hear from you ever again! Go away!” Yet, he was not an angry man and would never say these words to her.
Even while trying to solve the problems she would send him letters and gifts as if their relationship was still alive. This hurt him even more. She did not seem to see their relationship crumbling.
In time it became clear to him that she no longer cared for him at all. She was just desperate to keep a broken, one sided, relationship alive. Likely her only concern was that he would find another.
Finally, after weeks of her constant failings, with no new commitment to being a better partner, he decided the time had come. He knew how to tell her.
He sat down on the porch of his beach house, the salty mist sticking to his face, the oncoming storm blowing sand across his bare feet. He opened his laptop computer and clicked on compose a new email.
Dear Danica (aka GoDaddy)
It has become quite clear to me that you do not care about my needs any longer. My site has been down far too often over the past few months. Therefore, I have created a new relationship with BlueHost.
I’m sure this new relationship will be much better for me.
I wrote this story as a creative writing contest for Writerweekly.com on 4/14/2013.